A bit of a rant this morning, and something I’ve been chewing on for some time now.

I hear it and see it all the time; someone is “a natural”, especially in the lifestyle.   Natural submissive, natural slave, natural Dominant,  a natural (fill in the blank). People use this to describe others and they use it to describe themselves.

STOP. Just STOP.

Is there anything “natural” being the humans we are?  Maybe we are natural redheads as compared to fake redheads.  Maybe we are naturally short. I am. Or tall. I’m not.  Am I a natural woman? Not a chance unless it’s a specific reference to my biological gender.

We are shaped by our experiences and we learn from the day we are born. Some of us have an affinity for learning x, y, or z; their brains can more easily wrap around concepts, learn incredibly quickly, and/or complete tasks more easy than others.  But that, in my opinion is all.

You see, none of us are a natural submissive, Dominant, slave or whatever. None of us came out of the womb dominating others.  None of us came out of the womb being submissive in a lifestyle sense and sure as shit,  none of us came out of the womb on our knees offering our service to others with a smile.   It’s nothing but a term indicating what you or someone else thinks comes easy. Or easier in comparison to others. Or what we are most comfortable doing as we learn about it and apply it in our lives.

Lets take this out of the lifestyle.  My “natural” ability with plants of all ilk is a hard won skill.  That means learning about what fuels my passion all the time.  It means practicing it with lots of failures too. I’ve been gardening since I was three.  I’ve been growing houseplants since I was 5. I’m a self taught botanist specializing in area native and not so native plants.  I’ve killed my fair share of plants of all kinds with my “skills”.  And will probably continue to do so.  It doesn’t mean I’m a natural anything.  It only means I think I have more knowledge and understanding than most of my peers. But I have to PRACTICE.

I honestly don’t know abut everyone else but I work damn hard whether that is in the lifestyle or out.  I bet you do to.