I’m not one for resolutions.  I see it like the exercise machine we bought last year in an effort to do better. It ends up being the catchall for belts and ties and long worn out sweatshirts we profess to want to deal with but never do….

I bought Muse a dozen roses yesterday and placed them in a vase on his headboard where he would only see them as he went to bed.

The woman at the store was most gracious….I wanted just two, one Red and one Yellow.  But the cost was prohibitive for my earnings this week. For much less I was able to buy a dozen that were fresh and tight in the bud. She made a substitution for no cost to give me eleven Red and one Yellow after hearing it was for a special friend.   Sweet, sweet, sweet. And a beautiful handmade card I found to express my gratitude for all the months I’ve lived here even in our frustrations with each other.  I’m not the easiest person to Love.  Neither one of us are the easiest people to live with.  Still…there is plenty good here and plenty of room for friendship to heal and grow….apart.  I see where being so close and stripping each other bare has left us seeing the icky bits right now.  That isn’t all I see in him or me but it seems that in our frustrations-individually with life and with each other- that’s all we seem to articulate to each other.  Neither one of us want that.

I know he noticed I addressed it in (my all too clumsy) calligraphy using the pens and ink, and sealed it with the red wax and my monogram he gave me at Christmas.  *smile*  I always wanted to give a Man I cherish and adore, roses.  Special too since he’s never received flowers as a gift from any woman.  Not ever.  So…isn’t that’s what friends are for?  Yes, I think so.

The Red roses-not a symbol of romantic love here, but signifying courage, passion and respect. The single Yellow rose-friendship and caring.

I am grateful for friends who make my life so very special.

We are all so very blessed no matter what we think today…no matter how shitty or  hard life seems, today.  We all still wake up in the morning.  Yes we are all blessed.

What do I want with the New Year?   Just this.  For me and for all of you….

A Friendship Blessing

May you be blessed with good friends

May you learn to be a good friend to yourself

May you be able to journey to that place in your soul

Where there is great love, warmth, feeling and forgiveness.

May this change you

May it transfigure that which is negative, distant or cold in you

May you be brought into, the real passion, kinship and affinity of belonging.

May you treasure your friends

May you be good to them

And may you be there for them

May they bring you all the blessings, challenges, truth and light

That you need for your journey.

May you never be isolated

But may you always be in the gentle nest of belonging with your Anam Cara.

John O’Donohue from Anam Cara