I encourage you to read Greenwoman’s post related to this meme and another on diverting ourselves from accomplishing what we really want. I’ve also added the same category of “Mastery Through Accomplishment” to these posts.

Her posts really force me to think in more concrete terms and pinpoint some important questions.

I hope you’ll join in.

How do you usually divert yourself? In other words, what is your most common method of stalling?

I am a perfectionist. And I used to think this was a fine quality with all that attention to detail. Doing my best is certainly fulfilling, but spending too much time on any project/task also means I’m never finished.

What is the net result of your actions? How does this really affect you from reaching your goals?

I’m constantly arranging and rearranging priorities. The ones that are important tend to fall away and are never realized because there’s always one more (unimportant) thing to take care of….another edit, another stitch in that quilt, another line on a sketch, more reading in preparation for doing something I want to do. Nothing is good enough to let go of….

Are there changes in your life you’ve been contemplating lately?

Actually, there are a few gnawing at me.

I’m not particularly happy in my job. I like my field of Environmental work. I don’t like the atmosphere were I am now. It’s counterproductive to the way I need to live my life and be happy.

I’m also not completely happy about my living situation. I Love Brotherfriend and we are very, very close. He’s probably the most compatible roommate I’ve ever had (counting my husbands). But his living style is much different than mine. I am not a clutter person. Drives me nuts these days. It’s not my place to insist he do something about the three printers not being used, or the TV that’s been sitting on the floor for months.

Have you done anything to realize these changes you want?

Yanno, I found myself verbalizing this quite suddenly. *smiles* I told two close friends yesterday I want that job across the island which pays 30% more than I make now. And I want to be living Windward in 6 months time. In my book, putting thoughts out there in a concrete manner counts…

What fears do you have about reaching your goal?

Well there are a number of really easy answers, but since I’m trying to dig a bit deeper…

I am hesitant to live alone even tho I know I am fully capable of doing so. I still feel like a Stranger in a Strange Land. Further isolating myself means I get to figure it out myself with little to no input. And little to no company. The company part-even tho he is gone for weeks at a time for his job-is important right now.

The job thing…well…fuck…going to a new job so soon forces questions of whether I really am doing my best. Not trying to make it work. And questioning if I’m not just giving myself enough time to get my groove on or not.

Another is that I will have to make a 6 month-1 year committment on a new place at more money. I’m not even sure I’m staying at my job. If some fundamental problems don’t change in 30 days….I’m gone.

So I’m antsy about the whole situation and committing with such uncertainty right now.

What do you want to accomplish this week?

Write a long overdue letter to a friend.

What do you want to accomplish in the next month?

Be more disciplined…

I’ve not done my Morning Pages writing in quite some time. And I enjoy it. It’s a really creative process for me and I’ve let that go for the past six months. It requires rising very early and not being tempted to turn on the computer first.

I also want to do a walking meditation at least three times a week.

What do you think you should be doing right now?

Cleaning the kitchen. *laughs*

What would you like to be doing right now?

Sitting on the beach. *grin*

Any additional thoughts to help you on your goals? Oh for goodness sakes, I’ve added to this post 4 times today. I’m starting to think I’m either obsessive or a perfectionist. Or I’m prone to stalling. *wink*

Artwork by Kay Mace featured here.